I stopped other projects to write this non-fiction piece and maybe that’s part of what’s getting to me. I was working on a novel (that I wonder if ever will see the light of day). I was also working on a short story collection, querying it, actually (I know it’s not the most lucrative form of writing, but I love it.) I have other things I could be working on. I have an idea for another novel that's been poking at me. I have more short stories in me, waiting to burst out. I just don't think I'll be... satisfied until this non-fiction project is finished.
Sunday, October 21, 2012
I've Been Feeling Conflicted...
I’m feeling a little conflicted about my non-fiction project. It’s a memoir, I think. At least it’s about me. It’s not my life story, but it’s about a significant part of my life. A part of my life that when I mention it to people they’re reaction is something like "really?" or “what the fuck?” I can’t believe it sometimes, but it’s true. I felt the urge…the inspiration to write it after my recent job crisis. The crisis is over and the project is a third to half finished (it's difficult to imagine how many more words I'll use to finish it). I want to finish it. But I wonder who I’m finishing it for. Am I writing this for me? To get the story off my chest/out of my head? Or am I finishing it for you, the reader? Either way, I now find myself wondering, am I really interesting enough to be writing about myself for others to read. (Let’s call this feeling self-doubt.) Who am I to be writing about my life for you? Today I feel like I’m not anyone. But I also feel like this story is interesting and there might be a few people who want to read it.